something has changed

Something has changed in me this autumn. I am studying more, facebooking less, blogging almost close to nil and drinking slightly more than usual. There are 2 cups of crisp clear liquid and one of it is vodka, hopefully a successfull remedy for sleepless nights. Thinking too much but nothing good is coming out of it. I hate this feeling of regret.

I'll be moving to Inverness for GP posting next month on the 7th for 5 weeks. I am actually looking forward to it because i figure I'll be able to study for the mocks exam. Although i know there's a slight chance to go bonkers being all alone up north in that cold city.

I can see the leaves falling, the perfect scenery for a photoshot but i have no one to take picture of now. Grr ....

Kevin got burned again, good thing its only a first degree burn in the heart. I feel like a coward for walking off something although i know it will only end badly for me. From today, i shall fight all the urge to contact natalia. This moment here .... is the moment where i feel i am most useless.

But i know, just like the oil burns on my hands, i will heal with time, a long time maybe. hmm...